


Black Mischief

by Amalthea_Oberon



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Harry Potter Setting, Dumbledore Bashing, Gen, Original Character(s)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-13
Updated: 2017-03-26
Packaged: 2018-05-26 12:42:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 16,939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6239809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amalthea_Oberon/pseuds/Amalthea_Oberon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Janus Proteus Black takes very much after his father, causing mischief wherever he turns, leaving (near) ruin in his wake.</p><p>However, shunned from the wizarding world after Sirius' sentencing, he grows up knowing nothing about the world he was born into. That is until a certain short wizard comes knocking.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. A Father, his Cousin, and a Name

**Author's Note:**

> A mostly-cannon AU (if that's even a thing).

“Mar. They’re coming.” Sirius Black, his hair disheveled from restless sleep, bolted upright at the _bang_ echoing up from the front door. Jumping up, Sirius grabbed his wand, pulling on pants as he ran down the hall to Janus’ room.

“Marlene! We can’t wait! Leave your makeup and jewelry and lets go! The Death Eaters won’t wait until you’re pretty enough to attack.” Sirius bent down, reaching into the crib and bundling Janus into his arms. The previously sleeping baby peered up at his father, his curly blond hair a bigger mess than his father’s, if at all possible. His dark eyes welled up with tears in protest of being so rudely awakened.

A bleary Marlene stumbled into the room, wand in hand, blond hair in more disarray than would seem humanly possible.

“Sirius. Come back to bed. No one is here. Let Janus sleep.” This was not the first time Sirius had jumped out of bed for no reason in the past couple of weeks.

“But Mar. The noise…”

“Sirius. We’ve been over this. No one-.”

A blinding, poison-green light filled the room and Marlene, beautiful, graceful, sassy Marlene, fell to the ground in a muddled heap. Behind her stood a cloaked figure in a silver mask. The moan that escaped Sirius’ lips created a discordant harmony with the shrill laugh that echoed from under the hood.

“Oh. Did I kill my dear cousin’s beloved? Are you going to get me?" Another meniacle laugh. A gasp of false concern. "Oh but how can you with your son in your arms?” With a wave of a long-nailed hand, the mask disintegrated to reveal the stunning face of Bellatrix Lestrange.

A hatred, one that could never be dampened by familial ties, filled Sirius to the brim. Hot tears streamed down his cheeks, matching the cries of his son. Without thinking, Sirius raised his wand. “ _Crucio!_ ” Bellatrix’s wicked grin transformed into a look of shock which was instantly covered by excruciating pain. As she collapsed, writhing, on the floor, Sirius grabbed Janus and ran over to Marlene. Wrapping his hand around her wrist, the world spun. When it stopped, the only home he had ever known outside of Hogwarts rose up in front of him: the Potter Mansion.

Any sense of control that Sirius had broke in that moment and he curled up in the grass holding his son, crying into Marlene’s chest, her body still warm.

Eventually, Sirius’ tears dried, leaving a man numb with emotion. Raising his head, he absentmindedly stroked the soft, curly hair of Janus. The mansion in front of him stood dark and empty. The garden was overgrown; the windows in dire need of washing; an air of disrepair hung around the place.

Leaving Marlene laying on the grass, Sirius carried Janus inside. Walking through the house as if it were his own, he found the room that was created just for Harry. Waving his wand to clear it of dust, Sirius placed Janus in the empty crib. The moonlight shone through the window, making Janus’ hair glow. In the midst of all the sorrow, the small child had fallen asleep, for all the world oblivious to the way his life had just permanently changed.

Sirius gazed at his sleeping son. Part of him was jealous of the peace which permeated the small mind, the greater part incredibly sad for he would never know his beautiful and loving mother.

Leaving his son safe in dreams, Sirius returned to Marlene and carried her to his favorite tree in the yard: a large oak tree with wide branches and gnarled roots. “ _Defodio._ ” A deep grave appeared at the base of the trunk, tucked into its roots. “ _Morbilicorpus_.” Marlene hovered off the ground, her hair floating around her as if she were submerged in water. Slowly she was lowered into the grave, gently coming to rest at the bottom. “ _Orchideus._ ” A bouquet of red roses, yarrow, and honeysuckle materialized on her chest. With a tear in his eye, Sirius flicked his wand, the dirt falling back into the hole to cover up the body. With another wave of his wand, _Beloved Marlene_ , written in the most beautiful cursive, carved itself into the tree. The sky had started to lighten by the time he took his first steps inside.

With a sigh and a heavy heart, Sirius turned his back to the spot and returned to his son. Cradling Janus in his arms, Sirius curled up with his son on the couch, a small fire lit in the fireplace, and fell into a restless sleep.

\---------

He awoke early a cold fireplace and a restless Janus. And an empty stomach. Sitting up, Sirius relit the fire and found his way to the kitchen, hoping that there might still be some unperished food there. As he wound his way through the halls, he thought back on the last time he had been there - just after Janus had been born almost a year ago. November 5, 1980. He had been born three days before and everyone had gathered for a celebration. James and Lily with their little son Harry. Remus, Mad-Eye, Albus, Peter… They were all gathered in this wonderful house, filling it with laughter and joy. Ignoring the war raging around them for just a moment as they celebrated the birth of a new life.

That's how it should be. No war, no sorrow, no untimely death. But that's not how it is. Just as Sirius reached the kitchen, reality crashed over him like a tidal wave and he gripped the marble counter for support as his vision blurred in tears.

A sound behind him. Footsteps. Soft and careful. His hand strayed to his pocket - his wand wasn't there. He had left it on the couch with Janus. The room grew and the colors faded as his two legs became four and his spine sprouted a tail. While not entirely intimidating, being a mutt with teeth and claws was a hundred times more effective than being a wizard without a wand. Besides. Most people, especially Death Eaters, didn't know he was an Animagus. Not even Bel-. Not even _she_ knew.

"Sirius?" The voice was kind and caring. Familiar. But in his panic, Sirius couldn't remember where he'd heard it before. One foot appeared around the corner. Followed by another. They were bare. And the woman. She was in her nightgown. Her arms wrapped around Janus. Blond hair billowing over her shoulders, framing her pale, blue-eyed face. Pink lips curved into a smile. "Sirius. What are you doing in here? Come back to bed."

He was on two legs again. Running. Holding his family. "I thought I had lost you."

"You lost yourself when you betrayed your family - your own flesh and blood." It was a different voice now. A sharp pain blossomed in his side. Stumbling backward, Sirius was met by the crazed face of his cousin. Black hair, wicked eyes, a smile of ice.

\---------

"Sirius. _Sirius!_ " A hand on his shoulder shook him awake, saving him from the nightmare.

He bolted upright, pointing his wand at the voice. Janus stirred and began to cry.

"Sirius. It's me. Put your wand down."

"When was the last time we were here?"

"What?"

"Answer the question."

"November third last year - Sirius this is ridiculous!"

"Alice." A sigh of relief escaped Sirius and he all but collapsed into the chair behind him.

"Sirius, what happened? You weren't at your house. In fact it was practically destroyed. It's all over the Muggle news. We feared for the worst."

"They- _She_ came. In the middle of the night. And Mar-." He couldn't continue. All he could do was stare at his knees, grasping his wand as if hoping that some unknown spell could bring her back.

Alice rushed over, dropped to her knees, and threw her arms around Sirius. "I'm sorry." They sat there, Sirius trying his utmost to keep himself under control. After a moment, he stood and gingerly picked up Janus, rocking him until his tears ceased. The pain subsided slightly.

His stomach growled. So did Janus'.

Alice's face broke into a small smile. "Come one. We'll go to my place. Neville's probably hungry and Frank's hopeless when it comes cooking." She reached held out a hand. Sirius took one last look around, glanced outside at the giant oak, and took it. The world spun. When it stopped, the sounds of Muggle traffic came through the window of the humble living room. Sirius always forgot how loud downtown London could get and how impatient Muggles seemed to be, especially in their cars.

Another pair of arms encircled him. After a minute, Frank stepped back, positively grinning from ear to ear. "I'm glad you're alright, old chap." Despite all that happened, Sirius couldn't help smiling back. Frank was one of the most up-beat people he had ever met and had that strange and wonderful ability to make anyone around him happy.

The laugh of a child made Sirius turn. On the floor crawling towards him was a round-faced baby with wispy blond hair. He reached up to his mother and Alice bent down cradling the child in her arms, the love she had for him resplendent across her face. "Neville, dear. Are you hungry? Let's get you something to eat." Walking over to the kitchen, Alice waved her wand. Cabinets opened, the stove lit, and bits of this and that flew into a pot which hovered under the faucet. Once full, the pot skipped gracefully to the stove. Sirius sank into a barstool, still clutching Janus as if he would disappear at any moment. Alice took the seat next to Sirius, Frank standing behind them both.

"Sirius. What happened?" Alice's voice was calm and loving. But, as much as she tried to hide it, there was a hit of fear and panic. For 30 minutes they sat there while Sirius quietly recounted the last 12 hours. Somewhere in the middle of it all the pot served itself into three bowls. By the time everything was said, the food had been eaten, the dishes had washed themselves, and everything had been put away. The faint noises of cars, trollies, buses, and people floated up to the now silent kitchen. Frank stood in shock, Alice in tears, Sirius without feeling.

A knock on the door.

Everyone jumped at the sound. Frank strode over, grasped the handle, and cautiously peered through the crack. After a moment, the door swung open wide and a bespectacled man with a long, silver beard and bright purple robes entered the room, looking for all the world as out of place as a flower growing in a cement parking lot. The man transformed into a phoenix. "Order meeting. 1. London Eye. Car 13. Bubblegum." And with a flash of purple, the patronus had gone. As if on cue, Alice, Frank, and Sirius all got up. Sirius jumped in the shower, leaving Janus to play with Alice and Neville. By the time everyone was ready to go, it was half-past noon. Drawing out their wands, the world spun and settled. The great Ferris wheel loomed in front of them. Walking up to the worker, the three of them looked rather odd. One woman with a child on her hip, holding her husband's hand. A man with long, unkempt hair and another child in his arms. And all of them wearing long cloaks.

"How can I help you?" He had already encountered several of these people. The man could tell it was going to be a very interesting day.

"We would like to ride in Cart 13."

"You and everyone else. There have been quite a few asking for that specific cart. And I'm sorry, but it's full. I can allow no other passengers in that one."

"Bubblegum."

"Excuse me?"

"Bubblegum."

The operator's face glazed over. "Oh. Right. Just a moment sirs and ma'am."

"It's just like Dumbledore to put a spell on a Muggle and get away with it." Sirius, who had once found such pranks to be entertaining and harmless, found no humor in this. The London Eye continued to turn until Cart 13 reached the bottom. Thanking the poor operator, the five entered the magicked cart. Cart 13, which appeared for all the world completely ordinary, was anything but. The inside was at least ten times the normal size and furnished with soft chairs and sofas, a fireplace, and a small library. Ten wizards met the five that had entered. Dedalus Diggle, Elphias Doge, Aberforth and Albus Dumbledore, Rubeus Hagrid, Minerva McGonagall, Dorcas Meadowes, Alastor Moody, Fabian and Gideon Prewett. James, Lily, Remus, and Peter were missing, presumably in hiding.

"Merlin, thank goodness you're safe." Dorcas rushed to Sirius and Janus, wrapping the two in her arms. Stunned, Sirius did nothing for a moment. Then slowly, he wrapped his free arm around the small woman. She had begun to shake, wetting his shoulder with her tears. "I'm sorry, Dorcas. I know she was like a sister to you. There…there was nothing I could do." Minerva walked over and pulled Dorcas into a warm, motherly hug. The look on her face told Sirius that she was just as numb as he was.

Albus strode over then, an air of importance about him. "Lad, what happened." And so, for what seemed the millionth time, Sirius jumped in and review the events again, only this time with less feeling. He was too emotionally ragged to be so attached, even just one more time. He talked for what seemed like an eternity, but in all reality was only one revolution of the London Eye.

Silence permeated the room. Shock. Sorrow. Sympathy. Empathy. Mourning. Without a word, these emotions enveloped the lot as they looked at each other and, more carefully, at Sirius. A babble from Janus broke the silence. The young father held his son with a look in his eye that bespoke none of the sadness they were sure he was feeling.

Clearing his throat, Dumbledore called attention away from their thought to the matter at hand, "Sirius, we are profoundly sorry for your loss. Marlene was an excellent witch and a friend to all." Then, in a more serious tone, "I can now say with certainty that the Death Eaters are targeting members of the Order. It goes without saying that we should all be more cautious and avoid traveling alone when possible. Run before fighting. Some have already been targeted and Merlin I hope those in hiding are safe."

The Order began discussing the events of the last couple months since their last meeting: who were known Death Eaters, who specifically was being targeted, who had died, who had been caught, and so on. By the end it was nearly dark. The sun was setting, throwing a red glow on the city and the oddly cloud-less sky. Exhausted from the last two days and minimal amounts of sleep, Sirius returned with Frank and Alice to collapse in bed with Janus as soon as they got home.

\---------

The next few months flew by. Sirius watched Janus and Neville while Frank and Alice worked. He'd cook and clean, try to contact James, Lily, Remus, and Peter, and try not to think about Marlene. The occasional Order meeting was the only variation to his routine. Remus and Peter came sporadically, livening the mood like only the Marauders could.

October came. An owl. A letter. Lily and James and written, sending a picture of them and Harry. They were still alive. A semblance of peace, a small amount of relief, came to Sirius' mind. He kept reading. Peter visited every once in a while, though his visits had become more infrequent in the past few months. Remus, they assumed, was keeping underground as much as possible but still managed to write at times. He got to the end of the single sheet of parchment and turned it over. Nothing. One single page. But that was more than he ever could have hoped for.

He wrote back. He wrote about the order meetings and its members. Janus was walking and talking now. His first word was "dad" followed closely by "pa'foo'." He was looking more and more like his mother every day. He was happy and his laugh was the cutest thing ever. Even cuter than Harry's, no question. And with that, he rolled up the parchment, gave the owl a treat, and sent it on its way.

As though an answer to his prayers, he slept easier that night.

\---------

October 31. Sirius' favorite day. The day where the Marauders could be crazy and not get in trouble for it. At least not as much as usual. It was the day everyone else dressed up like them.

But that evening everything changed.

Frank, flushed and completely out of breath, burst through the door. Alice turned her attention from the stove to her husband. "Dear," concern evident in her voice, "what's wrong? What happened"

He collapsed, on the floor fists on the ground, shaking uncontrollably. "They're dead, Alice. They're…how? How could they have died? They were so well protected. Hidden. Prepared. And their son. He will now forever be father- and motherless. And for what? A prophecy? A legend? The fear of an evil man?" Alice ran to her husband and pulled him into her arms.

Sirius walked into the room in a trance, holding the _Daily Prophet_ , his hands shaking. Tears fell from his unblinking eyes onto the floor, the paper, his hands. "James… Lily…" His mouth continued to move but no words came out. Slowly, as if moving pained him, he sank to the floor, still staring at the _Prophet_.

 

_James and Lily Potter, longtime members of the Order, were murdered by the Dark Lord earlier this evening. They are survived by their son, Harry. The Dark Lord mysteriously disappeared, nowhere to be seen. Rumor has it that he has been vanquished, though the powers that did so are as of yet unknown._

 

Janus came stumbling out of the other room and fell into Sirius' lap. Shaken from his shock, Sirius enveloped him in a hug and cried.

Dinner was quiet. Frank, Alice, and Sirius were eating more out of necessity and something to do than hunger.

And then it hit Sirius: _Pete_. Why hadn't he seen it before?

The mousy man had always been fascinated by the power the Dark Lord had. But even worse, he had feared him in a way that made all the Marauders uncomfortable. Because of his timid nature, Dumbledore had made _him_ the Secret Keeper. Sirius didn't want to believe it, but he hadn't heard from Pete in months. But lately people had been disappearing. People who should have been safe. People who were hidden, and hidden well. People only the Order knew where they were.

He put Janus to bed. There was no singing, no nighttime stories, no laughs.

Sirius couldn't sleep that night. 3 AM with no hope of rest. He couldn't wait anymore. Throwing off the covers, he pulled on his muggle clothes and shoes. He made no secret of is leaving. As such, a bleary Alice stumbled out of the bedroom to check on the noise.

Barely glancing over his shoulder, Sirius saw the sleepy woman rubbing her eyes. "Alice, I'm going out. Take care of Janus while I'm gone, would you?" His unapologetic, flat tone said there was no arguing with him. But she was going to try anyway.

"Sirius, no. Disappearing isn't the way. Stay here. We all loved them, but you can't just go running off."

"I'm not running. I'm taking care of something." And before she could open her mouth to protest further, he apparated with a _pop_.

\---------

The world spun and settled. The neat little flat in London transformed into a cobbled street, the house on the corner almost unrecognizable. A crowd of muggles, witches, and wizards were gathered around the remains. There was no smoke, no fire. The muggles couldn't make sense of it.

"What could blow up a house like that besides fire?"

"A bomb, maybe."

"But that would still cause fire and smoke. The house is cold as can be."

"Gas?"

"No…"

But the witches and wizards hung back and whispered, their heads bent together, their mouths moving excitedly.

"It's over!"

"He has fallen!"

"The Potters will forever be remembered. It will be a day of celebration!"

"Their son will be famous."

"The Boy who Lived."

Sirius looked through the crowd searching for one person. Someone who didn't belong there. One friend. One rat. One _traitor_. A small man backed away from the huddled masses, fear in his eye. He turned and ran as if death was chasing his tail. And so it was.

Sirius took off after him. "PETE! Don't you _dare_ run from me!" Peter Pettigrew looked over his shoulder. The small man squeaked in fear as Sirius transformed mid-run into a large, black dog, catching up to him in a matter of seconds. He jumped, toppling Peter midstride. Human hands grasped the small man, turning him around on his back. Sirius' long hair cast shadows on his face in the pale lamp lit street.

"Peter. You were their Secret Keeper! What do you know? Explain. What happened?"

The boy who had followed him and James around, idolizing them, broke under the gaze of the intimidating, stern, grim man. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean to! I promise! I tried to get them out before he got there! But…" Peter paused, dread of a distant threat overcoming him, "You have no idea of his power, Sirius. You haven't seen him the way I have."

"I never would have allowed myself to!" His grip loosened as his suspicions were confirmed.

Peter struggled out from the larger man, standing. "I'm sorry for what I've done. But I had no choice. You would have done the same."

In one fluid motion, Sirius stood, drew his wand, and cast. " _Reducto!_ " An explosion. Ash. A finger. By this time the crowd they had left behind had caught up. Witches and wizards stood in shock and fear, muggles in confusion.

And in the fading lamplight of early morning, the shell of a man fell to his knees shaking.

\---------

Frank and Alice sat in their apartment that night in mourning and shock. James and Lily, the most jubilant and brightest of their class, were dead. And Sirius, the most loyal of friends, had brutally attacked Peter. Two boys had become parent-less that night but one would be a legend and the other a curse.

\---------

 

_Frank and Alice Longbottom, longtime members of the Order, were attacked by four Death Eaters last night. Their assailants, Bellatrix, Rodolphus, and Rabastan Lestrange, and Bartemius Crouch, Jr., were tried in front of the Council of Magical Law earlier today. They were sentenced to Life in Azkaban._

 

\---------

Augusta Longbottom sat in the office, eighteen month old Janus on her lap, his fluffy yellow hair making it difficult to see the woman across from her. The matron sat behind a large desk covered with files, books, and other odds and ends. She wrote furiously, filling out a long file. Augusta couldn't help but think how rather inconvenient it all was. _But then again_ , _she_ is _a muggle_.

"Are you the child's guardian?"

"Not by your standards. He was left with my son and his wife. His father was arrested. His mother died months before that. And unfortunately his previous guardians are no longer capable of caring for him or my grandson."

"And you can't take care if him either, I presume?"

"No I can't. And besides, he's the child of a family of miscreants and murderers. I will not have him in my house."

At this the matron's eyes narrowed. "Nor would I." A pause. "Right then. Do you have his documentation? Birth records? Any of that?"

"I'm afraid not. I can get them if needed."

"That would be appreciated. And what's the child's name?"

"Janus. Janus Proteus-" Augusta thought for a moment. _Do I want to burden him with that name if he ever does go to Hogwarts? No. I'll give him the chance his parents never could_.

The matron sensed her hesitation. "Janus Proteus..."

"That's his name. Plain and simple."

"Alright. Follow me, please." The matron stood from behind the mounds of paper in front of her. Walking around the desk, she opened the door and went out into the hall. Augusta hoisted the boy onto her hip and followed her up the stairs into the nursery. Cribs lined the walls. The three walked up to an empty crib right by the window. Augusta lowered the blond boy into the crib, giving him his favorite stuffed animal and blanket. Turning to the matron, she handed over a bag. "These are a couple of changes of clothes which I'm sure will be helpful. There are also some mementos from his parents. His father might have been a crook and his mother a misfit, but I believe they still loved him. Wait until he's ready. I trust you will know when that is."

The matron, surprised by the sudden kind, gentle attitude of the older woman, took the bag and looked inside. Picture albums, letters, a diary. Things every orphan wished his parents had left behind. "Of course."

Augusta walked out of the room. Turning at the door, she looked back at Janus. "Goodbye child. May your future be better than your past."

\---------

A few days later, an envelope came in the mail. In it was all of Janus' legal records. And while those  with magic could read the full name, those not so gifted only saw _Janus Proteus_ born to _Marlene McKinnon_ , father _Unknown_.

And thus began the life of a curly haired boy with a penchant for trouble.


	2. An Owl, a Letter, and a Short Man

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking so long to update! I had Finals and a couple of family emergencies but here's the next chapter! I'll try to be more consistent.

_Boom. Crash. Shatter. Meow. Hiss. Thud._

"JANUS PROTEUS! GET DOWN HERE THIS INSTANT!"

"What is it _now_?" With a sigh, Janus rolled off his bed, grabbed a book, flipped open to a random page, and read. He did this every time he might be in trouble. Reading was a great alibi - if he was reading, there is no way he could have been off doing some crazy shenanigan, right? Sometimes, it worked. Today, however, he was not so lucky.

Walking down the stairs, his nose in a book, he ran right into the very wet matron. Looking up at a scowling face, Janus suppressed a smile. "Yes, Miss Woods?"

Grabbing his ear, she dragged him into the sitting room. The furniture was so wet it looked like it had rained indoors. The cat cowered in the corner and a few of his orphan-mates were wringing out their hair and clothes. He surveyed the room, secretly very proud of his work. He had hid water balloons on the blades of the ceiling fan in order to cool the occupants a bit more than they were hoping for. _It went far better than I thought it would_. Some of his joy must have shown on his face because the matron's face went from angry to furious. Steam was practically pouring out of his ears.

"Up. Stairs. Now." If there was one thing Janus never wanted to see it was Miss Wood in a rage. He pelted up the stairs, almost tripping in his haste. Half an hour later, Miss Wood found him on his bed, reading. "Do you have any idea the trouble, let alone damage, you caused? This is the fifth time this week, but by far the worst."

Janus didn't respond. He was too busy hiding his grin behind his book. After a moment, he steeled himself and peered over the top, presenting the most apologetic facial expression he could possibly muster. Miss Woods opened her mouth, presumably to further reprimand the young boy, but remained silent.  Janus found this more unnerving than her anger ever was. Following her gaze out the window he was met with the oddest sight he could ever imagine: an owl flapping outside the window, a letter it's beak, a small pouch tied to his leg. Jumping down from the bed, Janus opened the window and stepped back for the large bird to swoop in. The two watched awestruck as the bird circled the room and landed on Janus' head. He caught the letter as it fell out of the owl's mouth and was immediately met with a short, sharp pain as it pecked his forehead. "Ow! Hey!" Dropping the letter onto the bed behind him he reached up and grabbed the angry bird off his head. Walking over to the window, he set it down on the sill. "Stay." Oddly enough, the creature seemed to listen to him, settling down to wait.

He turned back to his bed and picked up the letter. The tan paper sported emerald green ink. The most peculiar part of the address was the second line which read _Boy's Room - Bed by the Window_. Turning it over, Janus found a stamped crest sporting the phrase "draco dormiens nunquam titillandus" above a wax seal. Looking up at Miss Woods, he found she had moved to stand next to him. The tumult from earlier had been forgotten in the curious events of the last two minutes. He was about to open the envelope when one of the younger girls burst in talking animatedly about how Tommy had gotten his hand stuck in a vase and couldn't get out and please oh _please_ would she help him because Tommy didn't want to cut his own hand off.

Miss Woods scurried out of the room after the girl, closing the door behind her, but not before giving Janus a look that he clearly understood - he was not to leave nor was he to open the letter. Janus slid the envelope inside his pillowcase to save for later and was about to return to his reading when the owl hooted, obviously insulted at being ignored. Not knowing what to do, Janus picked up the large bird and threw it out the window, quickly slamming it shut so as not to be further attacked by the already exasperated bird. With a look that said _you'll pay_ , it flew off to where ever it came from. _I hope that doesn't come back to haunt me_. Glancing at his pillow wherein the letter rested, he rushed downstairs to see if he could help out Tommy. If not, he could always escape outside, leaving Miss Woods' wrath for later. It's not like she had actually _told_ him he wasn't allowed to leave.

Coming into the kitchen, he saw Miss Woods surrounded by a dozen kids pressed against the sink, Tommy's vase-encased hand under the faucet _. Clearly, I'll just be in the way_. Tiptoeing backwards down the hallway, he felt for the handle of the front door and snuck away without anyone noticing. Well, almost.

Closing the door and turning, Janus found himself face-to-face with the strangest man he had ever seen. Crazy wild hair white as snow, eyebrows to match, and a stern look on his face, Janus almost barreled him over.

"Jeeze, get out of the way." The old face turned even sterner, one very bushy eyebrow raising, and grabbing the small boy by the ear, the man dragged him back over to the door and knocked. It was then that Janus noticed he was floating exactly one foot above the ground. Startled, Janus followed the old codger to the door barely resisting - how _was_ he doing that? A sharp rap and a moment later, a damp Miss Woods opened the door holding a vase.

Her eyes traveled over the old man, coming to rest on Janus. If she found anything odd about the man's lack of grounding, she didn't show it. Putting on the best face she could, she gritted her teeth and smiled. It looked almost painful. Meaning to thank him, she opened her mouth but before she could speak, the man spoke, an unusually high voice escaping his lips.

"Ma'am, I come from Hogwarts. I am one of the Professors there. You no doubt got our letter this morning. There is a lot we need to talk about." Children peered around the slim figure of Miss Woods at the eccentric man. "Is there a place we can speak in private?"

Glaring at Janus, she opened the door wider to let the two in. Sighing, Janus stepped in behind his captor. Handing the vase to Tommy with very strict instructions to put it back where it belongs and _never_ put his hand in it again, the three proceeded to her office. Sitting behind her desk, she gestured to the two to sit. Realizing that continuing to hold his ear would be difficult and uncomfortable, the man released Janus with a stern look and sat.

Shifting in her seat, Miss Woods focused her gaze on the man. "I don't believe I caught your name earlier."

"Flitwick. Filius Flitwick."

"Now, Mr. Flitwick. What kind of school sends a letter via owl?"

At this he paused, hesitant to answer the question. "A very old school, Miss Woods. Very old indeed."

Miss Woods raised her eyebrow at the little man. She evidently decided this answer to be acceptable, at least for now, because she nodded and turned to Janus. "And what did you do for him to catch you and drag you back here?"

"Nothing! Honest! I walked out the door to find myself nose-to-nose with him and next thing I know I'm being dragged back inside. And by my ear, no less."

Miss Woods turned to the visitor, the look in her eyes begging for this to be false.

"I must admit he's right. I only assumed he had done something by the look on his face and the fact that he was sneaking away. I also needed to talk to both of you about young Janus' schooling." Surprised that for once the boy had done nothing, she settled into her chair and gestured for Flitwick to continue.

With everyone's full attention, he drew himself up as best he could and began again. "You, of course, have read the letter." Pausing for affirmation, he was instead met with blank stares, shaking heads, and disappointment. "No? Well, I'll explain. Hogwarts is a boarding school for the year, sending students home on holiday and during the summer months when classes aren't in session. The education is top-notch and as an orphan, the school will provide for all books, provisions, and housing. I have been elected to take Janus shopping for supplies-" Filius paused, a question on his face. Turning his attention to Miss Woods, Janus say her hand held in the air, motioning for Mr. Flitwick to stop.

"Mr. Flitwick-"

"Professor."

" _Professor_ Flitwick, please. This is all fine and dandy, but how do I know what you're saying is true? How do I know to trust you? For all I know, you're just some bloke off the street."

"Right. Well. I suppose that's fair. Janus, do you have your letter on you?"

"No. It's upstairs on my bed. Or rather in my pillow case."

"Would you fetch it for me, please?"

Looking at Miss Woods, he slowly stood and left the office, almost tripping over children at play. Taking the steps as sluggishly as possible, he retrieved the letter and returned to the office. Opening the door he found Miss Woods and Mr. - no, Professor - Flitwick laughing and talking animatedly.

"Why that sounds like a wonderful place! The Headmaster seems nice enough, the rules reasonable, the classes entertaining. As long as Janus is ok with it, I'd be happy for him to attend."

Janus sat down in his chair, for all the world confused. Miss Woods had uncharacteristically change her mind rather quickly. He hadn't been gone long enough for them to have had that long of a conversation, had he? Janus sat in his chair unnoticed as the two adults kept talking, throwing words like _Diagon Alley_ and _Hogsmeade_ and _Herbology_. After a time, thoroughly bewildered, Professor Flitwick turned back to Janus. "Merlin's Beard! What are you waiting for? Open it!" With an encouraging note from Miss Woods, Janus broke the seal and read:

 

 

HOGWARTS SCHOOL  _of_  WITCHCRAFT  _and_  WIZARDRY

 

Headmaster: Albus Dumbledore

_(Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock,_

_Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. of Wizards)_

 

Dear Mr. Proteus,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.

Term begins on 1 September. We await your owl by no later than 31 July.

Yours sincerely,

Minerva McGonagall

Deputy Headmistress

 

 

Looking up, Janus peered disbelievingly at Flitwick. "I'm going to learn magic? You've got to be kidding. Very funny."

"I'm very serious, dear boy." Flitwick responded, ignoring Miss Wood's request.

One look at the diminutive man told Janus everything he needed to know, the least of which being that he was, indeed, serious. He also seemed furious at the possibility of magic being a lie and the last thirty minutes being some elaborate prank. Making a note to never cross the old Professor, Janus turned to his Matron who was just as stunned as he was.

"Magic doesn't exist, Professor Flitwick, no matter how much we might like it to. The school seems like a lovely place, but how can I entrust Janus to you and your headmaster if all you do is _profess_ to teach _magic_?"

With a sigh, Flitwick stood, once again floating on air. Without a warning, he sank to the ground, his feet landing on the plush carpet for the first time his entire visit. Miss Woods bolted upright, leaning over her desk so as to still look at the Professor. "Wha-"

"Don't be alarmed. I've been using a hover charm to appear of average height. I am a good twelve inches shorter than young Janus here. You didn't notice my true height because you are what we witches and wizards call a Muggle - in other words non-magical folk."

Janus, understanding dawning on him, stood excitedly. "So _that's_ how you've been floating."

"Janus. You're telling me you've been able to see this the entire time?"

"Ya. Why do you think I came inside so willingly? I was curious. I wanted to know why shorty here was at our door, why he knew about us getting a letter this morning, and how in the world he was floating and why in _heaven's name_ you didn't notice."

The Matron stood gaping behind her desk, the perfect resemblance of a frog waiting for an unwitting fly to land in her mouth. Janus and Flitwick exchanged worried glances, thinking, waiting, watching. Janus was about to make sure she hadn't died from shock when Tommy burst into the room with yet another object suctioned to his hand, this time a little girl.

"Miss Woooods! Missy here needs to go pee but no _way_ am I going to take a _girl_. I'm a _boy_! I can't be taking a girl to the bathroom!" He continued on, describing in detail how distressing the situation was. Pausing for a moment, Tommy realized that Miss Woods was paying no attention to his obvious dilemma "MISS WOODS! Are you even listening to me?" Janus tensed, knowing that normally Miss Woods would never allow the children to talk to her like that. But, not entirely surprisingly, all she did was shift her attention to the two in the doorway, mumbled that she would return briefly, and left the room with Tommy and little Missy in tow.

Turning to Flitwick, Janus asked, "Am I really a wizard, Professor?"

"Janus. Do you ever remember doing something you couldn't entirely explain? Something wonderful, weird, surprising, or perhaps terrifying?"

Thinking, Janus ran through the last eleven years of his life. He remembered the time when he wanted ice cream, which he had never had, and in the next moment a vanilla cone materialized in his hand. When he had promised the younger children they could see the stars but it was raining and it suddenly wasn't. When he was lost and wanted to be home and he turned a corner and was suddenly walking up the steps. When he had punched a kid at school and broken his nose but also sent him flying back ten feet, which was more than his little eight-year-old fists could do. When he wished his English teacher would step on a tack after he had just been reprimanded for talking out of turn and he immediately did.

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"It's what we call spontaneous underage magic. It's how we know if children are magically inclined, regardless of the abilities of his or her parents."

"So…my parents, whoever they are, may be magical but they may also be, what's the word…?"

"Muggles?"

"Ya."

"That's right."

"Do I have to learn English?"

"My dear boy, what are you talking about? You already speak, read, and write the language, don't you."

Janus just smiled. If this school didn't focus on the nuances of grammar and vocabulary, he was going to have an easy time of it. He loved the sciences and was good at math, but his inability to form sufficiently sophisticated sentences in an essay was the bane of his existence. "Do people always react like that when they find out?"

"Like what?"

"Shocked? Stunned? Almost to the point of a heart attack?"

"Oh, when they find out about magic? Normally we don't give them a chance. Often they are charmed and don't actually know what's going on. I, however, disagree with the headmaster on this subject. I want to at least give them the chance to know. The Minister of Magic isn't too thrilled on the idea. It just gives them one more thing to keep track of and one more thing to do if anything goes wrong, which it looks like it might have." At this, the old wizard sighed. "I'll have some explaining to do when I get back to Hogwarts."

Janus looked defensively and challengingly at Professor Flitwick. Though he did not have a mother to call his own, Miss Woods was as close as it got, and anything or anyone who threatened her would not be tolerated. Flitwick noticed the indignant expression and smiled. "My dear boy. No harm will come to her. We do not in any way harm Muggles who discover the existence of magic, regardless of how they take it. She will be quite alright. Of that I can assure you."

"How did you get her to almost agree in the first place?"

"Well, it _is_ the most prestigious wizarding school on the continent. Beauxbaton's Academy in France would like to argue, however they are not nearly as old or as well grounded as Hogwarts. We have a reputation. I explained all that."

The two continued their discussion. Janus asked him questions about Hogwarts, what it was like, the people there, the classes he would be taking. Flitwick told him about the grounds, the professors, the houses, the types of things he would be learning. Janus hung on every word and Flitwick recognized the thirst of knowledge he had, a small smile creeping on his face. _This kid would do well in Ravenclaw, though his penchant for trouble might be a bit of a bother_. Just then, Miss Woods returned, much more composed than when she had left the room to help little Missy.

"I believe we were in the middle of discussing Janus' future schooling, Professor." She took a seat behind her desk, interlacing her fingers and giving the professor one of her no-mess looks. She meant business, and Janus prayed Flitwick recognized it. With a flick of his wand, a long roll of parchment appeared in the air, floating down to land on top of the matron's clasped hands. "What's this?"

"This, dear Matron, is a list of all the courses Janus will be learning at Hogwarts, sorted by year, complete with descriptions. It contains a list of the professors, the Board of Governors, the Ministry of Magic, the departments, the Minister, and their biographies. If ever there is a change of staff, the document will reflect it. If there is an emergency of any kind in the wizarding world, the document will alert you of the danger and the any precautions being taken. And most importantly, it will keep you updated on Janus' progress in school, his grades, any detentions given or suspensions in extreme cases, his general health, and if he's won any awards at the school, or if he's in imminent danger. It will also keep you updated on his house, any awards they receive, and any other information the head of house deems fit. In addition it will answer to possible question you might have about the wizarding world and anything in it." Here he paused, letting all the information sink in. Miss Woods had the document in hand and was reading it rapidly.

After five minutes of silence, and incessant fidgeting from Janus, she finally looked up. Staring at the petite man, Miss Woods contemplated everything she just learned. Finally, she asked, "How does it answer any question I want? And how do I see all the other information, besides the classes list and their descriptions?"

"It's a scroll of parchment. You'll have to opening up the document further to read more, like so." Flitwick went to stand beside Miss Woods, showing her how you roll the top and unroll the bottom to get to different sections of the scroll without having yards of unruly parchment in your hands and pointing out the different sections as he went. "And this is the sections is for questions. Simply ask the question out loud and it will provide you with an answer, backed up with sources, articles, and laws where relevant that you can read if you desire."

"That is quite an ingenious design." Miss Woods might have had an heir of business about her, but her eyes sparkled with curiosity. Janus could see that she was on the verge of letting him go, and he jumped at the chance.

"Matron. I'd _really_ like to go. Please?" The plea caught her off guard - Janus rarely apologized, especially when he should, and he certainly never begged. Turning to Flitwick she asked, "Are there any…Muggle?…subjects taught at Hogwarts?"

"No, there aren't. There's a class on the Muggle world starting in third year, but no, there aren't any subjects normally taught in Muggle schools at Hogwarts."

"I have one condition for Janus to attend - he'll still learn the conventional classes necessary for life in the _real_ world. And I am allowed to add conditions as I see fit."

"Certainly. However, I would suggest to keep that learning to the summer months where possible otherwise he'll be overloaded with school work and won't be able to enjoy time with his friends."

"I promise I'll make sure to keep up on my school work, Miss Woods," Janus interjected, "even if it takes up some of my summer holidays. I'm already three years ahead in my course work so doing some during the summer to finish shouldn't be too big a deal."

Flitwick raised an eyebrow. He had rarely seen a student so eager to go to Hogwarts, let alone be willing to sacrifice six or seven summers to do so. Even more impressive was this student, who should have just finished his fifth year in Muggle school, had, in fact, just finished his eighth. It was then that Flitwick decided he was going to do everything in his power to get Janus into Ravenclaw, if it was the last thing he did.

With a sigh, Miss Woods warily gave her consent, reserving the right to pull him from the school at any moment. Janus couldn't believe what he was hearing _\- that was way too easy_ \- and wondered if the document Flitwick had given her had anything to do with the decision - just because the professor had _said_ he disagreed with charming people in order to let Muggle students learn magic doesn't mean he didn't actually do so. Janus let it drop, knowing there was no way he could prove something actually did happen and, in sharp contrast to Flitwick, vowed to get into any house but the one the professor headed, if he headed any at all.


	3. The Blonde, the Spell, and the Hat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was able to update the same day! Hope this helps you guys forgive me for taking so long!
> 
> I'm going to start referencing the books and other people's fics.
> 
> ***Book Reference***  
> **Fic Reference**
> 
> The fic I'm referencing here (basically I stole the hat's song) is this one: "The Muggleborn Slytherin" (http://archiveofourown.org/works/6185806/chapters/14171092)

Over the next couple of months, Janus heard hardly a word from Hogwarts or Professor Flitwick. The letter had come in June but it wasn't until mid August that he saw hide or hair of the man. As such, when Janus was called downstairs to greet the Professor he half expected the old man to say "Sorry, it was all a joke. Hope you enjoy school. You'll have to catch up because Muggle classes have already started but I'm sure you'll be fine." Instead, Flitwick asked him if he was ready to go.

"Go where?"

"To Diagon Alley, of course."

Janus returned the man's enthusiasm with a blank stare. He had absolutely no idea what was going on.

"Dear boy. We need to buy your supplies for the school year. It starts in only two weeks and I won't have as much time later to come back and help."

Miss Woods, who had let the Professor in, handed Janus his shoes and bag. "Off you go." And with that, Janus was on his way to buy his school supplies. The entire trip was pretty uneventful. Except for the hidden pub, the magic wall, the crooked street, the fantastic clothes, the magic, the pets, and the wands, of course. Leaving the Leaky Cauldron, Janus stepped onto the streets of London, amazed that an entire world was securely hidden behind a pub on the corner. London, which had previously held such wonder and excitement for the young boy, had never seemed less exciting. By the time Janus had returned home it was getting dark. Most of the children had eaten dinner and been sent to bed. Almost all the other children were already in school, leaving Janus at home alone with those five years and younger. Tommy had complained, saying that he wanted to go to school with Janus, but Miss Woods would hear nothing of the sort. "You're not old enough to go there and even so, it's a very specialized school. If you're allowed to go you'll know when you're older."

Over the next two weeks Janus started perusing the books.  _ Hogwarts, a History and A History of Magic  _ were a bore, though still held some interesting information.  _ The Standard Book of Spells _ and _ A Beginner's Guide to Transfiguration  _ gave Janus some fantastic ideas for pranks. He wasn't allowed to touch his wand so he used a stick to practice the incantations and necessary motions. He found  _ One Thousand Magical Herbs and Fungi _ ,  _ Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them _ , and  _ Magical Drafts and Potions _ to be quite educative and incredibly fascinating. All of the books by Gilderoy Lockhart were, according to Flitwick, absolute rubbish. He was required to get them anyway, but the Professor also provided him with  _ The Dark Forces: A Guide of Self-Protection _ , saying it was much more reliable as a defensive spell book than the mumbo jumbo written by the curly haired celebrity _. DF  _ would, Janus assumed, come in handy as he had a knack for making enemies. Not only was he a trouble maker, but he was also top of his class without really doing the reading or studying at all. And as a Muggle, he was sure he was going to run into some people who were prejudiced against him.

He was only too right. At the end of the two weeks, Flitwick took him to King's Cross Station and made him run through a wall. He thought the old man was absolutely crazy and would only do it after Flitwick had gone through and back five times. Finally, with only ten minutes left to spare, Janus mustered up the courage, let out a loud yell, and charged the pillar, pushing his trolley ahead of him in case the wall suddenly decided to not let him through. He ran so fast and so hard he almost hit the bright red train on the other side, only to be narrowly stopped by Flitwick and a cushioning charm. Giving everything to the conductor, Janus grabbed his school bag and jumped onto the nearest car just as a host of red heads, two of which were twins, rushed in at the last minute. Janus walked down the hall, trying to find a blank spot in one of the compartments. He finally found one in a compartment containing a blonde, two gorilla-like thugs, a lanky boy, and a beautiful girl. Sliding the door open, he poked his head in to the obvious annoyance of the blonde.

"And what do you think you're doing? Get lost, newbie."

"I was hoping there was a spot open, but standing in the hall would be far preferable than sitting with you, especially given that foul attitude." It's true that Janus didn't really know what was going on in this new world, but he wasn't about to let himself be pushed around by a wizard with too much steam.

Standing, the unusually pale face slowly boiled to a beet red. "Do you know who you are talking to?"

"Well, by the look of it, an inarticulate ferret who, from the color of your face, had a mishap in a dye factory."

"The name's Draco Malfoy, heir to the great Family Malfoy. My Father is on the Board of Governors for the school. More accurately, he  _ is _ the Board."

"Oh, so you need your daddy to stand up for you, do you?" At this, the two gorilla-like thugs stood, making a rather menacing, if not impressive, wall behind Draco. "And when daddy's not around, you need your animals to do the dirty work, don't you?" The girl laughed, earning a stifling glare from Draco.

"Oh, come off it. He's just a little first year who obviously doesn't know his place."

"Shut  _ up _ , Pansy. He'll learn his manners soon enough. Crabbe, Goyle." The gorillas, evidently named Crabbe and Goyle, stepped around the young heir. Thinking quickly, Janus yelled "Help! These two fellows have lost their minds and are in immediate need of medical attention! They're being controlled!" The entire compartment froze long enough for Janus to close the door, lock it with a quickly muttered " _ Colloportus _ ," and strolled down the hallway, whistling _. Well, that worked rather well. I have no idea what I would have done had the spell failed me. All in all, not bad for my first try, I'd say _ . A few students had stuck their heads out of their compartments, looking entirely confused at the lack of anyone in immediate need. Janus eventually found a compartment with a spot. He quickly sat, briefly introducing himself but paying no attention to names, pulled out  _ The Dark Forces _ and read. At one point he must have fallen asleep because the next thing he knew, he was being shaken awake.

"Common! You're going to miss the boats!"

"Boats?"

"Go find Hagrid."

"Who's Hagrid."

"Don't worry. You can't miss him."

Gathering his things quickly, Janus slung his bag over his shoulder and stepped off the train, wand in hand.

"First years, this way! First years, this way!"

They were right - there was no way Janus could miss Hagrid. Even if he had been blind, the voice was unmistakable. Trying not to stare, Janus awkwardly stood next to the man, shifting his weight from leg to leg as the other first years slowly coalesced.

Once gathered the little group headed to the lake. With four to a boat, one reserved for the giant of a man, the half dozen boats moved smoothly across the lake. Janus was stuck with a nervous redheaded girl who obviously belonged to the family from earlier, an excited boy taking photographs of everything he could fit in his lens, and a blond who didn't seem all there.

***You'll get yer first sight of Hogwarts in a sec, jus' round this bend here."***

The sight was stunning: a large castle with towers and turrets black against the sky which looked to be filled with diamonds. Having grown up in the city, Janus had never seen so many stars and felt that if he tried hard enough, he could fall into the endless black and fly off to Neverland. Which, he realized, might actually be a place, what with magic being real and all. They reached the other side of the lake too soon. Stumbling out of the craft, Janus made a mental note.  _ I'll have to steal one of these boats one night and sit in the middle of the lake with tea and a book _ .

The rock path from the Black Lake to the castle wound along through the field in front of the school. The turrets and towers of the ancient building created an impressive silhouette against the dark sky. The crescent moon hung above the castle surrounded by stars making the perfect picture. Walking along the path, Janus let his eyes wander across the grounds. The forest the train had been running through surrounded the grounds on tree sides, meeting the lake and continuing along its shores. Off in the distance the strangest stadium Janus had ever seen rose high in the air, six rings on six poles rising out the stands making it look like a crown. In the middle of the grounds sat an old, mangled tree which swayed even in the absence of wind.

In his wonder of the surrounding landscape, Janus had entirely forgotten about the castle. Turning his attention back, the walls loomed over him. The entrance door five times his height was surrounded by statues of knights. They looked ready to defend the school and its inhabitants at a moments' notice. Walking up the warn stone steps and into the light, Janus thought he saw the heads of the statues turn.  _ I must be imagining things. Stone statues can't move, let alone fight _ . The tall ceilings, wide staircases, and impressive stonework of the entrance hall engulfed the students. Even Hagrid appeared small in comparison with to its size. It was a fortress and a palace, one that could be well defended if needed but felt like home.

Janus was the first to notice the commanding figure of Professor McGonagall as she surveyed the twenty-odd students, their mouths and eyes wide open. Though stern, he couldn't help but sense a mother-like quality to her. Stepping forward, McGonagall called for the students' attention.

***"Welcome to Hogwarts. The start-of-term banquet will begin shortly, but before you take your seats in the Great Hall, you will be sorted into your houses. The Sorting is a very important ceremony because, while you are here, your house will be something like your family within Hogwarts. You will have classes with the rest of your house, sleep in your house dormitory, and spend free time in your house common room.

"The four houses are called Gryffindor, Hufflepuff, Ravenclaw, and Slytherin. Each house has its own noble history and each has produced outstanding witches and wizards. While you are at Hogwarts, your triumphs will earn your house points, while any rule-breaking will lose house points."*** At this, Janus made a mental note  _ not _ to get caught. At least not in the first month of school. ***"At the end of the year, the house with the most points is awarded the house cup, a great honor. I hope each of you will be a credit to whichever house becomes yours.

"The Sorting Ceremony will take place in a few minutes in front of the rest of the school. I suggest you all smarten yourselves up as much as you can while-"***

A blue Ford Anglia, accompanied by a load roar, flew past the windows towards a the large, gnarled tree. The eyes of the students followed the red lights and a few seconds later, a muffled  _ crash _ followed by faint thudding echoed up to the castle. A wildly red haired girl dashed to the window.

An uproar of laughter, talk, and running feet sounded through the doors behind McGonagall. Her lips had all but disappeared and the look in her eye made Janus very sorry for whoever had been behind the wheel of the now-totaled car. Professor McGonagall turned gliding through the doors to calm the commotion. Springing forward, Janus put his foot in the narrow crack to keep it from closing and peered through, his curiosity getting the better of him. The Hall was in an uproar. Draco Malfoy was laughing gleefully. A host of red haired Gryffindor boys, presumably Weasleys, were crowded at the long expanse of windows along one side of the hall. A round-face boy and a girl with impossibly wild hair joined them, shortly followed by the rest of Gryffindor House. By this point, all of Slytherin House, (minus a girl with curly blond hair and the two boys sitting next to her) had joined in on Draco's merrymaking, though he far outdid the rest. The loud scrapping of a heavy chair sounded as a professor with greasy black hair and flowing robes marched around the head table down the main aisle between the house tables, passing McGonagall as he went. Janus thought he detected a slight smile of the mirthless face. Stepping back just in time, the grim man pushed both doors open, his cloak billowing behind him. Janus watched the man walk across the flagstoned entrance towards the main doors and out of sight. He thought he almost saw a spring in his step which jarred against the professional and purposeful walk of the intimidating man. Stepping forward he opened the door again to see a man with the longest white beard call for calm and attention. Surprisingly, the Hall fell quickly into order, the Weasley boys the last to leave the windows, their heads bent together talking in animated concern.

McGonagall returned to the double oak doors. In the relative quiet, the impossibly large doors opened without a sound.

_ If they're that big they should creak. Or make a noise. Or something. It's unnatural. Yet again, most things about this world are _ .

"Form two lines and follow me." Professor McGonagall led Janus and the other students through the Hall between long, benched tables and up some steps onto a dais where the head table and a solitary stool stood, the pedestal to the most sorry-looking hat anyone had ever seen. Patched, warn, and ripped in places, Janus wondered if it was, heaven forbid, the mascot of Hogwarts and if it was he was seriously rethinking attending this already strange school which got stranger by the minute.

At that moment, when Janus thought nothing else about today could surprise him, the hat opened it's mouth and sang:

 

**I’m ragged, old and ugly

I’ve been around a while.

But don’t judge me for my patches, dear

For I’ve a certain style.

 

Put me on your head, you’ll see

There’s nothing hidden there

For I can see your every scheme

The secrets hidden ‘neath your hair.

 

Look around this Grand old Hall

Four tables where you might sit,

But just one look between your ears

And I’ll tell you where you fit.

 

For a thousand years ago, about

Our four founders taught together

Until there came a single hitch,

A clash they could not whether.

 

Said Clever Rowena, this is a school,

We’ll teach those fixed on knowledge.

Brave Godric shook his head, he thought

Only those of courage should they acknowledge.

 

Sweet Helga held up a hand and said

‘Our students must work hard’

But Sly Salazar wanted only the best

And thought the rest they should discard.

 

They divided up their students thus,

But as the years went on,

Rowena knew a time would come

When they who chose were gone.

 

She brought the issue to the rest

For the four to make a choice.

T’was Godric though who gave me a tap,

Life granted, I was their voice.

 

So slip me on! I know my job!

I have never missed.

I know which name for you to take,

Where you will best exist.**

 

The room burst into applause. The Weasley Twins from Gryffindor table whistled, the blond from Slytherin cheered. Even the teachers were clapping, cheering, and laughing. Despite himself, despite his judgmental attitude, Janus smiled and laughed, caught up in the joy of it all. The students quieted as Professor McGonagall, the smallest hint of a smile still on her lips, stepped forward and unrolled a length of parchment.

"The Sorting will now begin. When I call your name, step forward." The Hall, which still had a small amount of chatter, fell silent, a sense of anticipation hung in the air.

"Buchanan, Angus." Angus sidled forward, nervously approaching the stool. Professor McGonagall lifted the grubby hat, beckoning for him to sit, sliding the oversized rim onto the first year's head. A moment of silent anticipation from all in attendance permeated the room. Then, without any warning, "HUFFLEPUFF" echoed across the room. The table decked in black and yellow jumped on their feet cheering. The other houses clapped, slightly disappointed that the first student wasn't theirs.

"Creevey, Colin." The shaking boy almost fell of his stool when "GRYFFINDOR" was shouted across the room. The table of gold and red dwarfed Hufflepuff's cries, banging on the table and stamping their feet, the Weasleys by far the loudest of the bunch.

Janus' eyes peered around the room, distracted by the fanciful sight. The other two tables, presumably Ravenclaw and Slytherin, seemed to look down on the rest. The table of blue and bronze held themselves with an heir of prejudice, the table of green and silver with an heir of nobility. Lit candles floated below the ceiling which portrayed the moon and stars from the cloudless sky outside. This ceiling, however, was dotted with little white clouds which floated back and forth. Taking a closer look, Janus realized that they weren't clouds but rather people. White, translucent  _ people _ flying around the room. He looked around to see if anyone else had noticed this phenomenon when "Hall, Linda" pushed him out of the way in her hurry to get to the stool and be sorted into "HUFFLEPUFF!" With another glance at the sky and a wave from one of the floating people, he turned his attention back to the ceremony.

"Harper, Anthony" went to Slytherin, "Lovegood, Luna" and "Morag, Alice" to Ravenclaw, and "Ogden, Sherry" to Gryffindor.

"Proteus, Janus." With a jolt, he realized it was his turn.

Before Janus could make a move to the center of the dais, the door opened and the greasy professor from earlier entered. In a drawling voice that fit his character only too well, he stated with an air of immense satisfaction, "Professor McGonagall. Headmaster. This situation is in need of your attention." And with that, he turned, the door closing silently behind him. The Hall paused, wondering what would happen. A sorting had never before been interrupted. The Headmaster stood, walking around the table. He was halfway across the room before McGonagall, her lips impossibly thin, decided to follow. Everyone's heads turned as they walked by, opened the doors, and left.

A moment of confused silence peppered with quiet muttering permeated the Hall. The Sorting was only halfway through. Glancing at the stool and the sea of faces below, Janus wondered if he should put the magical hat on his head or stand back and wait. A red haired girl, undoubtedly belonging to the Weasley clan, was about to cry when the doors opened again and Dumbledore stuck his head through the crack.

"Filius. Please take over while I, with Professors Snape and McGonagall, take care of the situation at hand."

The wee professor jumped down from his chair and scurried over to the stool. Janus recognized Professor Flitwick from his trip to Diagon Alley. He knew from personal experience that though he could be mistaken as a gnome from muggle fairy tails, he was a rather formidable, though oddly kind, little man.

Picking up the parchment, he read in his comically high voice, "Proteus, Janus."

Heads across the entire room shot in his direction. Four tables full of students ranging from 11 to 17 all stared up at him. The new kid with a family name no one knew was being sorted. Janus, who wasn't used to being the center of attention except for when he was pulling one of his pranks, nearly froze.

_ One step _ .

Janus turned his head slightly to find all the present teachers watching him carefully as if the next few moments would determine how his schooling would proceed for the next seven years.

_ Another step. _

He turned back to the students. The Slytherins were still happy from the earlier commotion.

_ Another. _

The Ravenclaws were acting above it all.

_ Another _ .

The Hufflepuffs were simultaneously concerned and amazed.

_ One more _ .

The Gryffindors were, at best, distracted, at worst, distraught.

_ Stop _ .

Janus turned his attention to the small wizard who had originally introduced him to this world of magic and wonder. The look in Professor Flitwick's eye made Janus almost jump onto the stool, nearly crushing the hat. Just as he was wondering how the midget of a man would place the hat on his head, he felt a tap on his knee and a high-pitched grunt which snapped Janus back to the Hall and the matter at hand. The tattered hat, which somehow decided the fate of people just by being put on, was thrust onto his lap. With shaking hands, Janus lifted it onto his head. The room went dark as the brim of the hat slipped down over his eyes and ears.

"Well, aren't you a nervous chap?" A voice of the murmured in his ear. Janus sat perfectly still.  _ None of the other students had talked back to the hat. Should I? _

"I can hear your thoughts, you know. I can see into your mind. Access all your memories. See your entire past, even that which you can't remember. All the information I need is in your head."

_ Okay. That's seriously creepy _ .

"You might say that. Or you could call it impressive. It's your choice. But then what do I know? I'm just a grubby, tattered hat, after all." Janus detected a hint of amusement. "Now." The voice had suddenly taken a very serious tone. "Let me take a look." Janus tensed. He expected to relive his memories and half expected the process to be painful. But nothing happened. The world got very still for what seemed like hours but was in all reality mere seconds. "Interesting. Very interesting. You're smart but hide it at all costs. Helpful, but only when it benefits you. Bold only when you are left with no other options. Your parents orphaned you at such a young age. Your mother, a Hufflepuff, died too early young and in such a cruel way. Your father…now that  _ is _ intriguing. He was a Gryffindor from a long line of Slytherins. But,  _ if _ you believe the stories to be true, he turned out a Slytherin in the end. Now what, dear boy, are you?" Janus' mind was racing. He was a wizard. And a pureblood from the sounds of it. But if that were the case, why had he been left at a muggle orphanage?

Janus got the sudden suspicion that the Hat was watching his reaction. He halted his thoughts on the spot, thinking about food and what, if anything, he would recognize on the long tables, whichever he joined. "Well then. I've made my choice. Or rather, you made it yourself." The voice had wry smile to it, one that Janus decided he didn't particularly trust. Janus grinned in spite of himself as he heard " _ SLYTHERIN _ " echo across the hall. His table burst into excited, though noble, cheers. The curly-haired girl from earlier yelled loudest of all. Malfoy, Janus was please to note, remained seated, both disappointed and confused at why a possible muggle was chosen to be in Slytherin House. Hopping down from the stool and tossing the Hat back to Flitwick, Janus strutted over to join the table decked in green and silver.

Sitting down, he turned to see "Ross, Shana" called up to be sorted. A short minute and a "SLYTHERIN" later, she joined him.

Gryffindor cheered as "Tremlett, Asiya" was sorted into their house.

Last of all, Flitwick called "Weasley, Ginerva." The hat had barely brushed her head before "Gryffindor" was, to everyone's obvious expectation, shouted across the hall. Happier than a rabbit in a cabbage patch she practically leaped down from the stool to join her family.


	4. Three Weasleys, Detention, and a Bit of Fun

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took so long!!! I was moving, and then I started teaching, and then I had so many other things come up and friends to take care of and myself to take care of - let's just say that life took the front seat for a while. But I finally got my chapter finished!!! I hope you enjoy it! Let me know what you think :)

Janus sat among his housemates in awe of the spread in front of him. While he had never truly wanted for anything, there was hardly enough money to ever have this much food on the table and in such variety. He made pleasant conversation with Shana Ross, but found her to be entirely too much of a stickler for the rules for his taste. As the evening progressed, he was content to sit back and watch his housemates converse about Harry Potter, an incident involving a sorcerer's stone, the quidditch predictions for that year, and who would win the House Cup. Many Slytherins were still sore over the sudden and extremely last-minute lose to Gryffindor, ruining their six-year streak. Favoritism, confundment, and several other reasons were thrown around, but all of them pointed to the Headmaster.

When the main course was magically whisked away and likewise replaced by dessert, Janus didn't know what to do - he had never seen any of these dishes and sat completely dumbfounded. The blonde girl from before just laughed. "Here, take some of these," she offered, "they're called cauldron cakes."

"Thanks. I'm Janus, if you didn't hear from the hat."

"Skylar."

"You're a Yank, aren't you? Is that common?"

Skylar laughed, a glint in her eye. "Oh, not really. I transferred from Ilvermorny on special request. A third year in school, but I've only been here for two."

"Hey mudblood, finally found some of your kind, have you?" Draco shot an icy smile in Skylar's direction. "Planning an invasion of filth?"

"Oh no, we couldn't possibly win against slime like you, Draco. We'd be too afraid of getting caught in the green mucus that drips off your unseemly name." Skylar's expression was an interesting mix of surprise and approval at Janus' quick retort. Draco went purple, and his mouth gaped without a response to fill the empty space. Those who could hear the exchanged laughed nervously, falling silent at Crabbe and Goyle's harsh stare. The only one left laughing was a pale man covered in silver splotches floating over the nearest platter.

"And what do you find so funny, Baron?" Draco snapped.

"My dear boy. If you wish to rule the world you need to nurture a more civil tongue and be able to jest and jab with the best of them. Unfortunately, you have neither skill. Our young peasant first year here has you far beat." Draco simply turned his nose up at the comment and continued his meal, though more subdued than before. The Bloody Barron nodded at Janus and floated off to join the others.

"He's the ghost of Slytherin House." Shana offered to answer Janus' unspoken question. "Seriously. Didn't anyone tell you anything before you coming here?"

"No, I can't say they really explained much to me, except for the courses and the base details of the houses."

"Who picked you up?"

"The short one." This comment was immediately met with a sharp thwak on his head. Turning, Janus came nose to nose with Professor Flitwick.

"A week's detention, Mr. Proteus. And on your first day, too. I'll see you in my office every evening after dinner, starting on Friday." And with that, Flitwick walked away, his white hair bouncing on his head.

Shana gasped, Skylar smiled, and Draco cackled. "That's got to be a school record. Not even the Weasley Twins have gotten detention that fast." Janus simply sat there, completely dumbfounded. Not in all his life, not with all his antics, had he been disciplined so quickly for an honest response. "What's the matter?" Draco drawled, a grin still on his face. "Snake's got your tongue? Not too quick now, are you?"

"Shove off, Malfoy." Skylar cut in. "He's just amazed that he was able to achieve the impossible." Directing her attention to Janus, she continued. "The Twins will be intrigued. Believe it or not, but you just made two very…entertaining friends. Most people would call them trouble makers. I call them geniuses."

The rest of the evening was met with stories and laughter. When the refilling plates slowed and finally stopped and it was time to turn in, the Prefects lead the first years to their dormitories. Although Janus had marveled at the many windows, turrets, and towers of the castle, the Prefects led him and the others down a spiral stone staircase, past empty rooms with long benches and tables, and ever onward down an undescript hallway.

The Prefect, who's name Janus never bothered to listen to, stopped at the end of the twisting hall, which had run into a dead end. Janus peered around, looking for a doorway or another staircase, but came up empty.

"Pure-Blood."

The wall slid aside to reveal another staircase that spiraled down, only this one with black, varnished wood and an elegant silver railing. The landing overlooked what the Prefect introduced as the Common Room. Janus' jaw dropped as he looked out from the landing at the room (if you could call it a room) below. Already filled with students years two through seven, the Common Room was in no way full. He followed his classmates down the stairs, positively awestruck as he listened to the explanation of each quadrant of the room. On the opposite wall stood a few chairs and an expansive library, backed by the two-story ceiling-to-floor glass walls and the lake beyond. To one side of the library was a corner filled with musical instruments, including a piano and harp, as well as ones Janus did not recognize, but was sure were expensive. On the other side of the library was a wide open area which was meant for spells practice. The wards around the area made the air shimmer and the lake beyond look surreal. Closer to the stairs was a sitting area in front of a ten-foot long fireplace, with a game area on the other wall. Dispersed on either side of the room were seven doors which lead to the dormitories. The entire room was furnished in green, black, and silver, making the underwater Common Room appear even more dreamlike.

Janus separated himself from the group and wandered over to the library, fingering the books. The titles were not just in English, but also in French, Russian, Japanese, and what looked like Ancient Latin and Greece. There were books on seemingly every topic, some considerably darker than others, and some restricted to sixth and seventh years. The wards around those shelves were enough of a warning for Janus to stay away - he wasn't dumb enough to test the magic of Hogwarts, let alone a House who looked down its nose at anything less than a Pure-Blood, as the password and Draco suggest.

Leaving the forest of shelves, Janus was met by a spell which hit the ward right next to his head. "Sorry!" an upperclassman called. Janus smiled and laughed. Getting an idea, he dashed across the room and into the first year boy's dormitory. Finding his trunk, he dug through for his Standard Book of Spells, Grade 1. Returning to the practice area, he hesitantly reached his hand out and waved it across the border. Finding no ill effects, he stepped across the line, smiling at the tingling sensation he felt as he walked through the magic barrier.

Flipping through the pages, Janus came to the spell he had been wanting to try. Setting the book down, he waved his wand and muttered, "Wingardium Leviosa." The book rose in the air, directed by the wand. Janus smiled, pleased with the results. He was so excited, he punched the air, making the book hit the ceiling and consequently fall on the head of the upperclassmen from before.

"Oi!"

"Sorry! I was just so excited that it worked! I promise I didn't mean it."

Laughing, she walked over, ruffling Janus' curly hair. "That's quite alright. I did cast a spell at your face, accidentally. I deserved it. Just be more careful, next time."

"I will. I'm Janus. Janus Proteus."

"Ah, the Muggle-born. If magic came so quickly to you, there must be a reason why the Hat sorted you here."

Janus didn't respond, but rather silently met the girl's eyes, being careful not to challenge her. Draco was one thing, but he didn't want to start a feud with someone far more experience than him. Besides, he didn't want to bring up what the Hat had told him. He didn't even know what to think of it, yet.

"Don't worry, I don't mind. It's just unusual. There's just one other instance in the last fifty years, and she's here now. You might have met her - Skylar French, the Yank. It's just odd that you two ended up in Slytherin, one after the other." She hesitated a beat, thinking. "Name's Bilshwick. Lacy Bilshwick. I'm a fourth year. My family's related to the Black family, though they've stopped talking to most of us, seeing as we're not all Pure-Bloods anymore. But they're no better than we are, really. Anyway. Enough with the history lesson. If you want any help with anything, just let me know. You'll be hard pressed to find anyone else in Slytherin who is as willing to help you, given your Blood-Status. Except Skylar, of course."

"Nice to meet you. I'll make sure to ask you if I need anything. Sorry again about the book."

Lacy just smiled, handing the hardbound copy to Janus and returned to practicing. Janus performed the spell a few more times, being careful not to hit anyone else. After what felt like an hour, he headed back to bed, book under his arm and stifling a yawn.

Janus returned the book to his trunk and undressed for bed. Sitting on the mattress, he looked around the room for the first time. There were three four-poster-beds including his own, a trunk in front of each and sleeping bodies curled under the blankets. Each bed had green and silver curtains which could be pulled around the mattress to provide privacy. Unlike the Common Room, the walls were solid stone with porthole windows, allowing for a small fireplace to warm the room as needed. The ceiling and floors, however, were solid glass, showing the lake and the waterlife therein. Smiling at his fortunes, the evening he'd had, and the overfilled belly he sported, Janus tucked himself in. He lay in bed that night staring at the moonlight coming through the waves.

Your mother a Hufflepuff…Your father…a Gryffindor from a long line of Slytherins…

Ah, the Muggle-born …there must be a reason why the Hat sorted you here…

I'm not a Muggle. I'm a wizard, and half-blooded at the very least. Hours passed as his mind thought back, trying desperately to remember anything Miss Woods had said about his parents.

But there was nothing. He had never gotten a straight answer from the Matron, and likely never would.

In the wee hours of the morning, Janus fell asleep, lulled into the world of dreams by the warbling of the waves. As his eyes closed, the tentacles of a giant squid seemed to wave good night.

\---------

They had the next two days off to explore the grounds and find their way around the Castle. This proved necessary, as Janus lost his way for several hours on Wednesday and for several more on Thursday. He enjoyed his time exploring, fascinated by the suits of armor and statues which seemed to have life in them. He passed the seventh floor corridor six times before he found his way, and he found several shortcuts he knew would come in handy later. His feet were sore by the end of his wanderings, but he had a better grasp of the castle than most other first years and went to bed excited for classes to start. He hardly slept, until his body collapsed from exhaustion an hour before sunrise.

His sleep was rudely interrupted by Anthony Harper who was shaking him awake.

"Come on! We're late and Snape does not easily forgive tardiness on the first day - even for his own house!"

Janus jumped out of bed, threw on his robes, and bolted, his bag flying behind him. Running up the stairs, the two settled down in the back corner.

As if born from the shadows, Snape emerged from the corner, his billowing black robes melding with the background making him appear larger and more formidable than Janus remembered from the day before.

"Mr. Proteus, Mr. Harper. You're just on time. In the future-"

Snape was interrupted by the long, slow, hesitant creek of the door as a small girl with hair as orange as carrots stepped into the classroom.

"Ah, Ms. Weasley. So like your family, disruptive as always. Five points from Gryffindor."

"But sir. We weren't even doing anything yet. Class hasn't even-"

"Mr. Proteus, that's a warning."

"But-"

"Since you were late, do you care to give the lesson you so obviously already know?" Snape entirely ignored Janus' protest, glaring at any Gryffindors who might dare raise their voice.

Ginny's blue eyes were swimming in tears. She seemed puny in comparison to the looming professor.

"No? Pity. Take your seat."

The redhead almost ran to an empty spot on the nearest bench, sinking until she could barely see over her cauldron. Snape started the lesson, lecturing about the many uses of different ingredients and the potions they could be used in, but Janus was barely paying attention - he was seething with anger. Janus was glaring so hard at his cauldron the water boiled. He started, jumping out of his seat.

"Yes, Mr. Proteus?"

"My water started boiling and I can't stop it! The fire isn't even lit!" The professor just stared at him.

"Last warning. Sit down." Janus sat, more focused on getting the water to cool than listening to instructions on what potion to make and how.

The rest of the lesson was entirely uneventful, minus the multiple times Snape commented on Ginny's incompetence, taking an additional fifteen points.

After class, Janus looked around for Ginny only to see her slip out and disappear. Muttering under his breath, Janus packed his things and headed for lunch, then Charms. The rest of the day, he had free, during which Janus elected to roam the grounds, keeping a weathered eye out for the youngest Weasley. The Lake he found stunning, but as the view from his common room and bedroom were even more awe-inspiring, he chose to continue his explorations elsewhere.

Though he had heard Dumbledore's warning at the feast, Janus walked along the edges of the Forbidden Forest, peering into its depths, which went from dark to darker quicker than seemed natural. Nothing was, however, entirely natural at this school. He passed the knotted, ominous tree, deciding (wisely) to give it a wide girth, and continued. He came upon an odd hut and a large pumpkin patch filled with gourds that shouldn't be allowed to exist in size.

But still no Ginny.

Eventually, he returned to his Common Room and the practice area to again brew the potion they'd done in class.

Janus' attempt was entirely unsuccessful as the potion turned into sticky sludge which refused to release anything it had gotten ahold of. In a panic, Janus found Skylar and begged her to help him clean up, exchanging the help for some Muggle chocolate Janus had smuggled in.

After the incident, he decided it was best to leave magic well enough alone for when he was more in control and knew what he was doing.

\---------

That night, Janus got directions from a passing ghost and knocked on Flitwick's office door.

"Come in!" A high, squeaky voice called faintly, welcoming him into the warmly lit office.

"Sir, I wanted to apologize. I was only trying to be honest."

"My dear boy. There are better ways to be honest. One must also be tactful. With your wit, I know you can."

Janus nodded. "Fine. What am I here for?"

"To help me solve a riddle."

"A what?"

"A riddle. If you can't have a command on your tongue, I'm going to give you that command."

"And how is solving riddles going to help me 'command my tongue'?"

"All in due time, lad."

Janus stared at the short little man, hair giving him another six inches in height. He could not believe his ears – he was in trouble but he was going to solve riddles?

"All right then," Janus smiled, "this should be entertaining. I enjoy riddles, but no one has bested me yet."

"We shall see. You are talking to the head of Ravenclaw House." Flitwick peered up at Janus under bushy eyebrows, a twinkle in his eye. "For your first riddle, solve the following:

Many have heard me,

But no one has seen me.

I will not speak back

Until spoken to.

What am I?

"Take your time if you need it."

For five minutes there was silence as Janus stared out the dark window, the gears in his mind turning.

"It's a sound, because you can't see sound. Will not speak back until spoken to..." Another five passed as he wordless ticked off incorrect answers. Finally, he smiled, having found his answer. "Ah. It's obvious. An echo."

"Obvious? Hmmm. How about this one?

I fly when I'm born,

I lie when I'm alive,

And I run when I'm dead."

"Fly, lie, and run?"

"Take your time. You may tell me tomorrow if you have to."

"No, no. I think I can figure it out before the hour's up." And so Janus sat in silence, all the while becoming increasingly frustrated as the answer alluded him. It wasn't an animal – they didn't move once they were dead – and it wasn't a ghost, because they weren't really alive, nor did they ever die. Twenty minutes later, Janus turned to the patient professor, as unmoving as the silence. "May I ask questions?"

"Why, yes."

"Let me rephrase. May I ask questions that you will answer – questions in regards to the riddle?"

"Now, that is more specific. Perhaps."

"Given my familiarity of the wizarding world – is the answer anything which I likely would not have come across while living among Muggles?"

"No. I'm not so unfair as to give you a riddle you couldn't answer because of your heritage. No, no. You would have seen this rather frequently in any world."

"Can I give up?"

Flitwick smiled. "No, I'm afraid you can't. We can move on to another riddle, but you'll have to tell me the answer to this one as well. Better we stick to one for now."

So Janus continued to stare at the night, wracking his mind for an answer, but to no avail. The hour passed, and Janus found himself wandering the halls, still trying to find the answer to the riddle. It was well after curfew when they found him – two redheaded boys identical in everything but the embroidered letters on their jumpers.

"Ah, there he is!"

"The only Slytherin to ever receive detention on the first day!"

"And a week's worth, too!"

"You've got our record beat."

Janus kept walking, glancing sideways at the twins on either side of him. "Let me guess... you two are Weasleys, right? Skylar mentioned you, though not your names. Said I made some very entertaining friends because of my detention."

"Entertaining?"

"I think she downplayed us a bit. What do you think, Fred?"

"George, I couldn't agree more."

"I think she needs to be reminded just how entertaining we can be."

"Janus. It is, Janus, right? You look like a fun-loving type. How would you like-"

"-to help us-"

"-pull a prank-"

"-on our dear friend, Skylar?"

"I think getting my mind off this blasted riddle Flitwick gave me could do me some good. Besides. I've been reading up and have some fun ideas for pranks now that I can do magic."

"Magic?"

"You're jumping a bit ahead, my friend. You see-"

"-we try not to use magic on the first one because-"

"-it's going to escalate-"

"-and if we start off with magic-"

"-the end would put the school out of business."

"It's a very delicate balance."

"Would you guys cut it out!"

"Cut what out?" the Twins simultaneously answered with a knowing smile.

"Switching off mid sentence. It's not natural. And it's very hard to keep track of."

"Sorry, mate."

"You'll get used to it."


	5. A Yank, a Plan, and a Riddle

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'M SO SORRY about getting this out so late. But here it is! Between wedding planning, getting married, moving across the country, settling in, finding a full-time job, having loads of internet issues, and getting sick, I got a bit side tracked.
> 
> But here it is and I already have some plans for the next chapter.

The three mischief makers planned until midnight. As Janus sleepily walked down the stairs into the common room, he was met by Skylar, who was still up reading.

"And where have you been?"

"Detention, remember?"

"That ended hours ago."

"I was trying to figure out a riddle and – got sidetracked." Janus tried to look inconspicuous, hoping she wouldn't be suspicious as to why.

Skylar simply nodded as if it all made sense and returned to her book.

"And why are you still up? It's not like you have any homework to do for tomorrow."

She sighed and looked up at him, closing the book with her finger holding her place. "Sleep isn't really my thing. Besides, Snape and I have a sort of hate-hate relationship. I pissed him off my first year here and he hasn't forgiven me since. So you could say that I have extra work, as well as weekly detentions until I graduate."

"I thought he favors Slytherins."

"He does. But I'm a Yank, a transfer student, and a Muggle who is bent on having more fun than learning how to ensnare the mind or bewitch the senses through the art of potions." She finished this last bit in a mocking, but impressive, impersonation of their Head of House. "That and I caught him on a very bad day. Any way you put it, I'm screwed and it's my own fault, though he's not an angel either."

"I hope I didn't catch him in that same mood today," Janus sighed as he plopped into an armchair.

"Oh?"

"I defended a Gryffindor."

"Ouch."

"And a Weasley at that."

"Oh good." He was surprised my Skylar's genuine smile, given that almost every Slytherin had at least a slight distaste for the ginger crew. "What happened?"

"Ginny was a millisecond late, and Snape came down hard on her for it, saying she was interrupting a lesson which hadn't even started and that if she insisted on being late she could teach it. I told him it wasn't fair, and he told me to back off and proceeded to breathe down her neck for the rest of the class."

"Did he take any points away?"

"No, but he did give me a warning."  
"I would stay clear of him for a month or so. Don't act out. But you should be fine, as long as you didn't insult him to his face."

"Not unless he can read minds."

Skylar simply blinked, a flash of worry and a bit of curiosity in her eyes. After a minute, she simply shrugged and returned to her book.

"What are you reading, by the way?"

Distracted, Skylar answered in a low voice, "A book on occlumency and legilimency. Quite fascinating, but a bit difficult to grasp."

"What's--oh, never mind."

"Look. It's almost one in the morning. I like reading because I don't like people much, and I like reading at night because people don't normally bother me," She shot a pointed look at Janus, "so, if you don't mind, I would like to continue reading. I don't understand the stuff well enough to explain it to you anyway. Now. If you please..." At this, Skylar returned to her book, signaling the end of their short conversation.

Janus slowly stood, surprised at her reaction. After a moment, he turned and walked towards his dormitory door, though not before sticking his tongue out at the concentrating and moody blonde.

\---------

The next day was a Saturday. And while it was a break from classes, that didn't mean Janus had the luxury to relax. He re-brewed the potion from yesterday yet again, calmly making sure he paid attention to every detail and pointedly not thinking about a certain red head. When lunch came around, he made his way to the Great Hall for as much food as he could stomach. As he finished his last bowl of pudding, he looked up to find Fred and George staring at him. He raised an eyebrow and they responded with a smile and tilt of their head towards their table. Licking off the spoon, Janus joined the mischief makers at the Gryffindor table. It was not unheard of for people to be sitting with their friends in different houses during breakfast and lunch, but it was unusual for a snake to be amongst lions.

Then again, Janus was in no way ordinary. He confidently sat across from the twins, ignoring any whispers that might have followed him. "So. Do you have anything special in mind for our resident frienemy?"

"Frienemy?"

"We're all friends, yes? But, if I'm not mistaken, for all intents and purposes we're competing for the time being. Hence, frenemy."

"Ya, I don't really have anything in mind. I don't know her well enough. But I get an odd sense that creepy-crawlies might not be her favorite thing."

"The kid's sharper than he looks."

"That he is."

"Ok, Janus. Here's the deal-"

"We're going to fill Skylar's bed-"

"-with the thing she hates most-"

"-spiders."

"That's terrible. You're terrible!"

"Oh, they won't be real-"

"-but they will be moving, though without magic-"

"-because of the rule, see-"

"-so we bought wind-up toys, like the Muggles use."

"Our dad goes crazy about Muggle things."

"I see… And I suppose that I'm the one who has to put them in there? You do realize that I'm a boy, right? I can't go into the girls' dormitories. And you said no magic."

"We said no magic traps but we never said we can't use magic to set it up."

Janus could only roll his eyes. He had given up on ever trying to convince them of something which seemed so incessantly unimportant to them.

Over the course of the next hour, Janus and the twins devised a way to smuggle the muggle contraptions in. Janus listened to them theorize which spells would best help the muggle contraptions work.

Half of their theories ended in potential explosions.

In the end, they decided to order an extra ten so that they could experiment and maybe tease someone named Ron, who Janus felt oddly sorry for.

The poor bloke doesn't even know what's coming. At least Skylar and Ron, whoever he is, get a break from these rascals during the summer months.

Janus had no idea how incredibly wrong he was.

\---------

Later that day, after finishing classes and working "dutifully" on his homework, Janus once again knocked on Flitwick's door.

"The answer is snow" he said to the top of the fluffy white head that appeared in the now open doorway.

"Very good. Took you long enough. How did you come by the answer?"

"I asked someone."

At this, Filius smiled and shook his head. "Resourceful, yes, but you're here to learn how to think." The last three words were punctuated by a sharp rap on the forehead from Flitwick's wand.

"You didn't tell me I couldn't," Janus retorted which rubbing his forehead, "so I did just before coming here (her hair was enormously bushy). I thought about it all day today and some last night-"

"Ah, but you were also up to shenanigans with the Griffindor mischief makers."

Janus decided, wisely, to keep his mouth shut and look complacent. After a minute, he looked up and asked for the next riddle. Flitwick returned with a smile, though there was a gleam in his eye which made Janus nervous for what was coming.

"What has two pairs of eight and makes grown men scream?"

"Two pairs of eight?"

"Yes."

"That's it?"

"I've already given you everything you need." Flitwick sat on his cushioned chair, which was quite a feat as Janus' feet would have dangled above the ground. Still, as short as Flitwick was he could somehow see over the desk. "And no help from students. Or staff." He added the last part quickly just as Janus was getting ideas.

Janus was stumped. No matter what questions he asked, he could not find the answer and the look in Flitwick's eyes made Janus think he was messing with him. He went to bed that night puzzling over the riddle, with a terrible pit in his stomach that said Flitwick knew something.


End file.
